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Tuesday, September 16, 2014

12 Things I've Learned Through Motherhood

Lessons in Motherhood
Oh, the journey that is motherhood. Does anyone else feel like they are on a roller coaster covered in peanut butter & jelly being operated by the cast of Frozen? No? Just me... Well alright then.
Lately, I have had some spare time to sort my thoughts & I thought I would share them with all of you. This post is brought to you by the public education system, since I now have about 8 hours of time without my little wolves. Without that time to myself, I think that I would probably be writing about the same thing, but the teachers & school staff that are spending so much time with my wolves, impress me everyday. The kids LOVE their school & come home filled to the brim with things to chat with me about & they wake up every morning so thrilled to be able to head off to another day of school.
Basically, my thoughts are actually somewhat sorted now thanks to the kids being off in school filling their brains with lessons & fun things. So, more motherhood posts are coming your way since I have more time to think & reflect on this journey I'm on!
1. I do not go to every, activity, meeting, or whatever else, is going on at the kids school. With the public education system, I feel like schools try to show how great they are by hosting multiple activities a week. From PTO meetings to showing movies on Friday nights, our school has SO much going on all the time. Last year, I spent so much of the year being racked with guilt about not going to everything that I gave myself an anxiety attack over a Friday night movie. It was a movie the kids had already seen, we had a snowmachine race the following day & our entire house had the flu 48 hours before hand. For some reason, I lost my grip on reality over a movie being shown in an elementary school gymnasium. After it was over, I realized that being able to attend every, single, thing, at the school would not define my as a good mother. I do enjoy being involved with the school & helping out when I can, but just because I'm a stay-at-home-mom, I DO NOT need to be at the school daily... I still feel slightly guilty about not being more involved with the PTO again this year, but I've got to stop letting that get to me.

2. Kids with dirty faces makes me boil. Oh, they beauty of parenthood. With 3 kids under the age of 8, someone, somehow, always has a dirty face. Whether it is literally, dirt, or food, or stray boogers or toothpaste...one of my children has something living on their face. It makes me CRAZY! I'm obsessive with wiping their faces or sending them to wash their faces, or the dreaded...lick my thumb & wipe whatever it is off of them. Sometimes, I want to wipe the faces of children I see in restaurants, Target or anywhere...

3. I'm addicted to building LEGO sets. On any night after the kids have gone to bed, there is a chance that I'm playing with LEGOS. I really love to build them & place them on the kids desks or at their spots at the table to surprise them in the morning.
4. Pain is LEGOS. Stepping on LEGOS is a level of torture that should be saved for shoplifters & people who do their kids homework for them.

5. I want to cry every time one of my kids says, "You're the best mom" or "Mom, you're my favorite mom" or "I just think you're the best mom, Mom." I often struggle with the idea that I'm rubbish at being a mother. I have spent many nights laying awake in bed contemplating every single decision I made involving the kids that day. My kids are so bluntly honest with how they feel about people, so when they say those things to me I know that they really mean it & it makes me feel so wonderful.

6. Messes are not the worst thing to happen. Here's the deal, my house is never going to be spotless. At any given moment someone is making a mess & I can't clean it up before someone else makes another mess. Although, keeping a neater house is something I'm trying to improve this year, I'm not going to lose it every time someone spills an entire bucket of toys on the floor or pulls out 50 books that I just put away & organized by color.

7. Living life with routines, is crucial. To say that I did what I wanted & lived by the seat of my pants pre-motherhood, is quite an understatement. While I've always loved a good plan, I have always been terrible at sticking to a routine of my own. Thanks to motherhood, routines are not my own, they are dictated by the 3 little wolves whom I love so much. If routines are not stuck to, if books are not read before bed, if blankets are not tucked in in proper order, melt downs occur, little wolf rage spills out & I have to use my mommy-monster voice just to get some control back.

8. Motherhood has brought out a better, more creative, side of me. I have enjoyed DIY projects for as long as I can remember. But with having children, I can come up with any craft project or Pinterest inspired fail & someone is happy. When glitter spills all over the floor or hot glue burns 5 layers of skin off of my finger, someone laughs & we create something amazing.

9. I can pack for our entire family for a long weekend within 2 hours, but I can't decided what to make for dinner for an entire week.  Many meal plans have been tried & failed in this house. I don't know if it is because of my 3 year-shortlived career in the culinary world, where meal planning was 99% of my job or if it is because I suck at keeping my own routine or what, but I can never create or stick to a successful meal plan. Go ahead, ask me whats for dinner at 3PM tomorrow, I will have NO idea.

10. An impromptu Disney dance party can fix anyones bad day. Try it, sing Let it Go at the top of your lungs, belt out any Disney classic from 90'-98', your quality of life will improve.

11. My children will suck every ounce of positivity & energy out of me. They will also drain my ability to think complete thoughts or finish a chore. I'm not sure how but things always balance back out & I end up being able to function, happily most days.

12. The kids need just as much reassurance that they are amazing, brilliant, wonderful, smart, talented, & fantastic children, as I do about my ability to be a mother. If I'm having a bad day as a mother, chances are that they are fully aware & in some way they probably feel like it is their fault. It's not. Justin is gone a lot for work & often, well, constantly, I'm trying to make up for his absence. I try to do everything & fill the void when he is away, but the truth is that I can't be a mother & a father. I have learned now to just focus on the things that I know I CAN do, & if the Justin things do not happen all the time, we will all be okay. If we have a bad day, I make it a point to tell the kids 3 extra things that I love about them before they go to bed that night. I hope it helps them release the bad day & reassure them that no matter what kind of a day we had, I absolutely, will always love them.

Those are some of the things that I have learned through my journey this far into the land of motherhood. As I was writing this I realized that there are dozens of hilarious things I have also learned from being a mother, so watch for that list sometime soon. ;) I hope all of you who are making the journey through parenthood, are off to a great day or have had a great day...depending on when you are reading this. If you aren't or if you didn't just take a deep breath, there are more hours in the day tomorrow.